used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
How external is "for external use only"?
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
