I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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