Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Having a random hookup so left but love u
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize
