i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Pants are for mortals
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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