he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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