There was a lot of him and a little penis
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
