I just pynch a tree in the face
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
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