? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
