Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
