I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Randomize