Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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