Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Randomize
