dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
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