Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Randomize
