Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
