dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
