Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
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