I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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