yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
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