I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
