physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
