I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
This baby is an asshole
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize
