how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
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