i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Randomize
