He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Randomize
