I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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