you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize