I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Randomize