I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
Randomize
