i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
i think im in europe. pls send help
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize