And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
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