Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Randomize