Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Randomize
