I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
