Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
