I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
