Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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