there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Randomize