I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize
