your room smells of hookers.
And success
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Randomize
