So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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