He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
16 People Who Have Raised The Bar For Petty Revenge
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Here’s Why Hotel Photos On Travel Websites Are A Complete Hoax
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.