just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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