Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
