the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
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