oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
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He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
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