I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
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