OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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