nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
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