So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize
